Do you remember the time in elementary school when you got the opportunity to go outside for recess? You were probably filled with the anticipation of meeting a new friend or two. As you approached the playground and saw a group of children, some questions may have begun to fill your mind.
You may have wondered, “How will I make friends? How do I know which person would be a good friend?”
It is interesting how similar choosing friends during adulthood, is to choosing friends as children. Of course as an adult, we are not usually meeting our friends on the playground, but anytime we are placed in the position of interacting with new people as adults, it could feel as though we are being transported back to that very time.
The playground helped us chart our leisure connection with different individuals over the years, while being exposed to a variety of negative and positive personality traits. The very skills we gain on the playground can transcend to the workplace and friendships as adults.
I would like to identify the concept I regard as The Playground Effect. The Playground Effect is a concept I came up with that explains how meeting people in adulthood, is not much different from meeting them as children. Some of us were able to learn from those experiences by being able to recognize toxic personality traits in people more readily; while others continue to ignore red flags and fall into the same traps over and over again.
In order to help you avoid the quick sand, I plan to discuss at least seven personality types you have encountered in the past, and still encounter today as “adults.” Being mindful of these past transactions will help identify personality traits and people you should embrace or avoid.
Let’s talk about the group of 7 people/personalities to avoid according to The Playground Effect
- The Mean Girls (or Guys)
- The Sour ‘ole Gossips
- The Back Stabbers
- Fair-Weathered Friends
- The Emotional Vampire (checkout my previous blog for more information https://wordpress.com/post/schoolspiration.blog/287)
- The Narcissist
- The (Negative) Influencer
These are some of the most dangerous friends to have because they can lead you to do things that can change your life forever. If you know right from wrong, it is best not to second guess yourself, and go in the opposite direction. These types of friends will not support you thinking for yourself and will usually try to convince you to do wrong. They are not reliable and are around during “fun times” but will leave you holding the bags when things go south. Be aware of The Negative influencer
We first recognized the negative personality traits at a young age, and even as adults they could still plague us today. The good news is that the next time you are at an event and you meet a person, think back to when you were on the playground and the kids you chose to play with versus the kids you ended up leaving behind on the monkey bars; and go with that gut instinct.
You can use those same skills today. The interesting thing I have found is if you can remember back to those times, your friend choices have not changed very much. Take time to reflect, if you have a history of befriending negative people, it is time to make a change. I challenge you to start evaluating your friendships and cutting off the ones who fall into one of the seven categories above and make it your mission to become friends with the opposite of those people. If you use The Playground Effect when meeting new people, you may able to avoid carrying negative “friend weight” around with you repeatedly. *Life is too short to surround yourself with mean-spirited people, there are too many nice guys out there!Life is too precious to remain stuck in an unpleasant story, so go ahead and close that story book and began a new one. ~Kamina FitzgeraldHave a peep at my Books On Kindle or Paperback!SchoolspirationThe Value of Career and Technical Education in Addressing College and Career Readiness and the Ill-Prepared Workforcehttps://www.amazon.com/Technical-Education-Addressing-Readiness-Ill-Prepared-ebook/dp/B07M5Q8CTG/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1546043268&sr=1-1Bumperstuckle Village: Patience is a Virtue